WWE Royal Rumble 1-29-12

Welcome every one to the high review of the royal rumble ppv 25th aniversary, vvery nice we start off with the world title match triple threat cage match, bryan, henry and show, my prediction for this match is d bry is going to work henry and show against each other they either will be beating each other up or knock each other out and he will escape the cage and keep the title, so here we go, d bry is already in a corner down and out, and big show uses the cage as a weapon, and loos like he has already bent the cage, big show punches the cage and henry is taking a break this is why triple threats hardly ever work, it comes down to 1 on 1 and the other member takes a break, that was a nice kick to the knee by daniel bryan, show sold it well this is bryans second attempt this early in the match to win, though i hope it doesnt last too long, its already began to bore me, and not but 15 minutes into the ppv and we have to hear about fucking twitter, that was horrible, i hate the twits and the tweets fuck em, now bryan takes a break and henry is back after a long break and he is limping doubt thats a sell, doubt henry is that good, i think the crowd is chanting lets go andre, suprisingly big show and daniel bryan have had some good back and forth, i think his elbow is bleeding, yeah bryan is bleeding from the elbow, we are teased with a submission win my bryan and here comes henry from his thrid break this match, bryan goes to the top big show grabs him, and pull him back to the top suprisingly, bryan fighting again, another escape tease, big show, showing off his strength and show drops him though i dont think he was supose to win right then i think they had a lil more but oh well thats the cage match, and thats why d bry is part of my fav five,commercial break, wait what the fuck, oh fucking elimination chamber preview feb 19th one day after ventana and psychostik that means i got to get a weekend off shitty might miss that, wow we are really hyping this cena v rock, so lets see this suck cenas dick promo, you know most times when your supose to be a face and half the crowd boo's you, you lose your job, but not cena, no makes it an angle, i hope him and angle go to prison and get shanked by the same guy after they boss lose their anal virginity to him, is that mean? this promo will not end, its funny this whole promo all these shots from young and now, not one wrestling move, haha thats some great shit, and divas match, wow this is all like a big bunch of fast forward, wow i guess we have team colors and every one got the memo except lady snuka, wow  match goes on for 3 minutes with out one wrestling move and the first one was a booty pop moonsault, very pg, nice, but let me repeat this because this match is boring, a wrestling match went a full 180 seconds with out any wrestling moves being performed, in the jcw try outs that me and mike did all we had was 3 minutes to impress the people and if we were good enough they would give us 2 more to finish the match, and they did no moves in the time span we had a full match, including top rope spots chair spots and barbed wire spots, fuck the divas devision, i just heard im sorry you yelling my face yelled to a ref,  it took 5 other divas to catch one kelly kelly, but only one of snukas kid to damn near kill undertaker at mania, and the body builders and twins win, i just tried to fast forward it, we recap raw zac gets hurt eve tells cena leave us alone, yada yada yada, wow what the hell is up eves ass she telling every one off, if when eve opened the door for ryder and his couch blew up that would be the shit, and is cena really next is this math happening now, its not going to be the main event holy shit im fucking shocked, lets see if cena embraces the hate, idk we will see, that was kind of a cool begining of an entrance, i still dont like that mask though its just bulky doesnt really make a lot of sense, shockmaster type shit lol, ha, i like they eyes on it but thats it, my finger itches , this match is kinda boring a bit, but it is cena, but i guess there is no stip on this, which is odd, i thought there would be like a no dq or something, people in the front row of the hard cam golf clapped for a clothesline from kane, something is wrong with kanes arm, he keeps favoring it, in a non sell way, that was a horrible attempt at my finisher for paco, the south of the border i think i called it but i dont remember that could of been bobby's finisher i cant remember, shut up im high, are they really going to do a super plex, oh no he is gonna do his gay leg drop thing off the top, hope kane sits up, oh he is going for the 5 knuckle shuffle off the top even gayer, fuck you faggot, that was a hell of an elbow to the jaw to cena, wow double count out gay, cena hits kane with a big piece of rubber, that sounds gay lol, saying gay a lot, cena is o n screen cant help it, he kicked him in the shin, what kind of shit is that why do you kick a man in the shin, oh no he found ryders dressing room, ha the door landed on him, the white powder on kanes ass takes away fro mthe creepiness, what is kane doing, tombstone really, is that the big finish, please tell me you set her on fire, damn here comes cena, wow thats it a tombstone and a choke slame no sodomy, disapointing, guess this is a mania match, one of the matches had to end early cause we drug out that ending, oh dont be a bully, nice right after kane bully's ryder, oh wait thats right kane cant face cena at mania its rock fighting him, so what going to happen this going down on elimination chamber now a rock suck fest, what the hell is drew macentrie doing out here, what the fuck is this, some one is going through the spanish announce table, hell yeah funkasaurus rex hell yeah this is whats good, and drew says thats the scrizz, i dont know what scrizz is about alright, he got the jello going, we knew that would be short one, now a slim jim commercial, pizza here gotta eat, punk zigler is next, the worst  part of this ppv so far is having to see vicki on my screen, i love the random err and or signs, its funny, so finally the matches goes to start and johnny comes in and bans vicki interesting, cole just said that he is good awresterls casue he was a world chmp in japan, the same man who said no matter what you do in pro wrestling if its not in the wwe it doesnt matter, right on the snout, and then an amazing reverse spinning power bomb, wow i agree with booker can some one tell me what the hell went on yeah, and at 9 45 we start the royal rumble, my legit pick, santio marella, my two fantasy picks , brock lesner or batista, mizz is talking to start yeah, its not a last man standing they can be laying down in the ring, and then get up and throw ur ass out, and number 2 a ry wow, can any one explain the 0/10 sign? and rily is eliminated already one man down 28 to go, who is next, and r trtuh, wow i spelled that all wrong, and rhodes is number 4, idk what move truth did to miz before rhodes came out but god damn it looked bad, and not in a good way, jay finds the two white guys beating up on the black guy funny and so do i, and ur number 5 is justin gabriel, 6 is epico and a few good moves and truth gets out and mizz is knocked out on the outside, my bad primo not epico, and 7 is mick foley, hell yeah i wanna see him eliminate every one, cole should never say he should have bang banged himself again, that was wrong, delrio is back in the rumble, wait a secod this is awesome, ricardo is number 8, and ricardo goes ham hell yeah, you cant say shit about ricardo with out saying that he takes some fucing amazing bumps, god damn, nd number 9 my personal pick to win the rumble nd rodregez is gone, santtino lives, and its a cobra socko face off, and here comes other epico at 10, and there he goes, the snake and the sock lock up and then santio is gone now i got to get a new pick and there goes foley, and 11 is kofi, i dont want jericho to win god damn, miz and rhodes try to eliminate kofi as 12 is the king he comes from ring side, that was dope, and mizz dekc rhodes and it goes ham time, oh old man nipple slip, and he is gone, rhodes and mizz still in it with kofi, behind the numbers on the countdown looks like backon, and ezekiel jackson is number 13, let him eliinate a white guy please, and 14 is gender bender, 15 is khali, who fuc cares, gender gets eliminated and 16 is some mexican, 17 is booker, and did he sit that entire ppv with no pants on, kofi pulls some pimp shit hand stand and 18 is dolph and vicki comes damn, nothing really going on and 19 is hacksaw jim duggan, and he is gone already, damn, so we got rhodes mizz, some mexican ooker khali and dolph, and now no more booker or khali double elimination and 20 cole god damn it, he cant figure out to get his head gear on, and 21 is kharma holy shit she returns, and big black woman eliminates some black guy, and dolph eliminates kharma, leaving the ring to dolph zigler miz rhodes kofi and at 22 shameus a big pick to win it, and shameus eliminates kofi, and in at 23 road dogg fucking road dogg, and now 24 is uso number 1, 25 is swagger and this rumble has been mid card central i know there is a lot of mid carders at the rumble but damn, and 26 is wade barrot, eh, still sucking not a great thing here getting dissapointed, and eliminates road dogg, 27 lucky number is david fucking otungo, now number 28 is randy orton getting a lil better, aparently rhodes was in evolution with orton according to mizz, uso and barrot get eliminated, 29 is jericho the whole time it was black there was still a match going on, ontogo elimated by y2j , and who is the 30 who is it who is it, and it is disapointment big show, wow fucking gay, and eliminates swagger before show even gets in, and show eliminates rhodes and mizz o now its just show orton dolph zigler never mind there he goes, so show orton shameus and jericho, show and orton get eliminated jericho and shameus are left, lets go sheumus that would be awesome, shameus win holy shit im happy with that, jericho doesnt win but we still have 15 mintues, and jericho is missing teeth, i think i need ot learn how to spell his name now,